Article
I Am Just a Flicker
May 26, 2020
This is my testimony. I am a flicker in the sky. But who am I? Why am I here? Why do I even exist? I am just a flicker. But every night is a strange night. I am feeling mighty scared, and I even don't know what to think. First, when I look around, I see a vast expanse of silent blackness. I can't even see the end of this vast nothingness. But this humongous darkness is scary. It is as if the massive blackness with it's mighty volume is determined to battle my flicker out. Can I fight this battle? No, I don't think so. I am just a flicker. Can I stand up against the frightening blackness whose strange silence is akin to a menacing tiger crouching silently behind the bush to prance on the unsuspecting prey? No, I don't think so. But much more scarier is the vision above me. Far far away from me are the strong and mighty lights of the universe. They are big. They are bright. They have millions and millions of years of experience. And even the scary blackness shrivels in front of them. And they have kept gawking at me throughout the time I existed. I have no idea what they are thinking of, or I am even significant enough to be considered? But they have not said anything or even grimaced at me. So I am even more scared to look up. As I stand here as a flicker, I wonder why I am even here? Why did God create me? Do I have a purpose? Why did he make me so small and insignificant in the presence of strong and mighty? Why did he fashion me just a flicker to battle the onerous blackness?
But one thing I realized I have been fashioned to be flicker and flicker I need to be. But I kept thinking, why do I even exist? Why did the Creator create me? Suddenly it dawned on me that the answer is not around me in the vast nothingness or above me in the midst of the strong and mighty, but it's below me in the midst of the men, the crown of God's creation. Alas! Why didn't God fashion in me the knowledge of his purpose? Why did he allow me to be scared and quiver? I realized only through the feeling of insignificance that the beauty of God's personal purpose shines through. Hallelujah! I am created for His masterpiece. There were some wise men down on Earth who understood the stars, and they realized with elation that the sudden appearance of a flicker is the sign of a great cosmic event. But I didn't know that. I just knew that they kept their eyes on me through some contraption they named telescope. I may stand amid the insignificance, but those ever gazing eyes told me that I have a purpose, and I have significance.
As I kept looking at the peering eyes, I realized that they have saddled their camels and are ready for a journey. And suddenly, there was a jerk—a pull from somewhere. I looked over the horizon, but the expanse did not reveal the source of my pull. I realized I am just pulled away. And as I was being pulled away I saw the vast nothingness paving the way for my journey. And when I looked up to behold, the strong and mighty had smiles on their faces, and there was a song being hummed from their lips. Then I realized the pull is not from emptiness but from my Master and my Creator. Listen, my readers, when the Master pulls the scary blackness bows and the strong and mighty sings.
I was so enamored by the grandeur of the moment that I didn't realize that my pull was the pathway of the camels saddled by those wise men. And I kept being pulled away till I reach the small tract of land nestled between the mighty Mediterranean Sea and serpentine Jordan. And when I looked down, I saw those wise men though tired and frazzled yet kept following me to see something. But what was that something? Where am I being pulled? Why am I being pulled to a dry mountainous terrain which did not look significant? I have seen some great places and landscapes, but my pull kept me going. But why? Why is the insignificant of the sky pulled to the insignificant of the earth?
Oh, how can I continue my story? My heart is pumping, and my eyes are teary. Laughter just erupts from the bottom of my heart. How can I tell you where I was pulled? I have no words, but is not the words that you need? So please hear me out. I was pulled to a small house. And suddenly, I heard sounds of joy and laughter from the great wise men but hurriedly took something from their bags. And forgetting their fatigue and disheveled looks hurried inside that small house. I peered through the small window to see what these wise men are looking at and realized they have fallen prostrated in front of a small baby swaddled in clothes sleeping peacefully in a manger. I would have missed the magic had I not looked around. The vast nothingness was conquered by the smiling stars and singing choir of heavenly hosts. It was the song that gave away the son. He was the glorious impossible. He was my eternal Master entering into time. He was my everything and my all sleeping peacefully in the arms of a beautiful mother. I had seen the face of my Master and my Lord. What more do I need or ask? I was the message of my Master—the herald of his birth. As I kept smiling and laughing and rejoicing, I realized I had fulfilled my purpose and simply shut my eyes. I was not afraid or scared, but just complete. Amen.
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